Authenticity. It’s one of those words that gets thrown around a lot. Be authentic. Be real. Be yourself. But what does that actually mean?
For me, authenticity is about living in alignment with your truth, your values, and your lived experiences. It’s not about checking off someone else’s list of what’s allowed or not allowed.
And embodied authenticity? That’s when authenticity isn’t just an idea in your head or a caption on Instagram, it’s when your choices, your actions, and your body are all living it out.
Two Sides of My Authenticity
Here’s a personal example: in the past, I always made it a point on a second date to show up without makeup. Not because I don’t love getting dressed up but because I also wanted them to see me natural. For me, that’s two sides of my authenticity: the fresh-faced me and the glammed-up me. Both are real. Both are me. Some days I love the ritual of makeup and fashion, and other days I love the freedom of being completely bare. Neither cancels the other out.
The Complexity of Choice
Here’s the truth: women’s choices are not simple. Whether it’s makeup, implants, Spanx, kale smoothies, or hair dye - none of these choices exist in a vacuum. Every decision we make is tied to our stories, our pain, our desires, and our culture. For one woman, getting implants may be about reclaiming her body after cancer. For another, choosing to go makeup-free may be her way of healing from years of being sexualized. And let’s not forget, toxins aren’t just in mascara tubes. They’re in the food we eat, the lotions we rub into our skin, the air we breathe, and the water we drink. Yes, many of these things are toxic. But here’s the important distinction: toxic and inauthentic are not the same thing.
Authenticity isn’t about banning things. It’s about asking:
- Why am I choosing this?
- Does this choice expand me or shrink me?
- Am I acting from fear, or from freedom?
Direct Truth vs. Judgment
The post that sparked this episode said “fake” things aren’t authentic or liberating — that they don’t allow a true relationship with your body. But here’s what I noticed: that wasn’t a universal truth. That was one woman’s belief about what she needs to feel authentic. That’s valid, but when we turn our personal beliefs into rules for everyone else, it becomes judgment. It becomes one-dimensional. Authenticity isn’t a cookie-cutter. What feels fake to her might feel freeing to you. What feels suffocating to me might feel liberating to you. And that’s okay. The real difference? Direct communication with kindness builds bridges. Judgment disguised as “truth” slams doors shut.
Embodied Authenticity in Action
So how do we practice embodied authenticity in daily life?
Here are three questions to guide you:
- Pause & Feel: Does this choice expand me or constrict me?
- Intention Check: Am I choosing this from fear, proving, or desire?
- Body Wisdom: How does my body feel when I imagine not doing this?
At the end of the day, authenticity isn’t about the mascara, the implants, or the kale. It’s about whether your choice brings you closer to yourself — or takes you further away.
The Invitation
My invitation to you is this: let’s stop turning authenticity into a competition. Let’s stop measuring each other’s choices as “real” or “fake.”
Embodied authenticity isn’t about the thing, it’s about the truth underneath the thing. And when you live from that place? That’s when you’re free.
Watch the FULL Embodied Living Episode here
Or maybe believed femininity was about having the right outfits, flawless makeup, and perfect hair?
Yeah… I did too. For years, that was my definition of femininity: an image. A performance.
Yeah… I did too. For years, that was my definition of femininity: an image. A performance.
Meanwhile, underneath all that? I was living in my masculine energy 24/7 - task-oriented, structured, in control of everything because honestly, that felt safe. And let’s be real, the world rewards it. Hustle hard, achieve more, do more. Sound familiar?
But here’s the truth: Feminine energy isn’t about what you wear. It’s not about perfection. It’s an energy. A way of being. And most of us? We’ve been taught to suppress it, twist it, or hide it altogether.
In this episode, I’m getting raw and real about what it means to reclaim your feminine essence and why so many of us have lost touch with it.
Why Feminine Energy Has Been Suppressed
We live in one of the most masculine-driven cultures in the world. The U.S. thrives on competition, achievement, and independence. It glorifies hustle. It worships productivity. And in that world? Feminine energy gets labeled as weak, emotional, or worse, dangerous.
We’ve been told:
❌ Cover up, because men can’t control themselves.
❌ Don’t be too emotional, or you’re unstable.
❌ If you want success, you better hustle like hell.
Meanwhile, emotional intelligence, the very thing they mocked us for, is now the #1 leadership skill companies are desperate to teach. Let that sink in.
Your femininity is not a liability. Your feelings are not a flaw. Your body is not an invitation for someone else’s lack of self-control.
My Story: Masculine-Masked with Cuteness
For years, I thought femininity was an accessory to my hustle. I believed I had to overplay my masculine traits; organization, control, time management, to be respected in business. And then? I sprinkled on lipstick, cute outfits, and perfectly styled hair to look feminine enough.
I didn’t realize then that I was disconnected from the real power of my feminine energy. I thought it was something external. I was wrong.
What I’ve learned? I don’t have to choose. I get to integrate both. My masculine gives me structure. My feminine gives me creativity, intuition, and flow. Together? That’s where the magic is.
The Awakening
In 2008, everything changed. I went on a women’s retreat in Costa Rica (side note: go if you ever get the chance). For the first time, I experienced feminine energy as safe. Women hugged me without judgment. They supported me without an agenda.
I left with a hunger to understand masculine and feminine energy. I studied David Deida. I dove into Alison Armstrong’s work. And here’s what I discovered: feminine energy isn’t weakness. It’s power. Not loud, not forceful—but magnetic, life-giving, and deeply wise.
How to Start Reclaiming Your Feminine Essence
This isn’t about rejecting your masculine side. It’s about harmony. When you integrate both, doubt dissolves. Confidence rises. Here’s how you start:
✨ Slow down. The feminine can’t thrive in a rush.
✨ Drop into your body. Put on music, breathe, move your hips.
✨ Feel before you act. Ask: “What would feel nourishing right now?”
✨ Add pleasure to your day. Light a candle, savor your coffee, touch your skin with love.
The feminine doesn’t need to prove. She knows. And when she knows, the doubt fades.
See the whole episode here:
